Friday, August 22, 2008

Real Olympics

I've made good progress on the sweater this morning, so I thought I'd pause and offer these thoughts on the Real Olympics. I know we call them "the Olympic Games," but by and large "games" do not belong in the Olympic contests. I say these events must go:
  • Badminton
  • Baseball
  • Basketball
  • Beach Volleyball
  • Boxing
  • Fencing
  • Football
  • Handball
  • Hockey
  • Judo
  • Softball
  • Table Tennis
  • Taekwondo
  • Tennis
  • Volleyball
  • Water Polo
  • Wrestling
Anything that is a direct match-up between two people or two teams is something other than the Olympics. (I know: you're going to fight me on Wrestling since it has tradition behind it. I don't care; it meets the "match-up" criteria, so it goes).

I also say we ditch "Equestrian" for a species violation. And we should lose Rhythmic Gymnastics because its stupid.

Final Rounds

The Olympic Torch will be doused at noon, Eastern Daylight Time, on Sunday. Coincidentally, I have to start work at that time, but I'm off today and tomorrow, which (barring accidents) should be plenty of time to finish my Ravelympics project.

What remains is to shape the front of the neck, join the shoulders, lengthen and attach the sleeves, and knit the collar. The first of these remaining tasks will be the trickiest for me. No pattern; just working from screen caps.

It probably would be bad luck at this time to say, "I am a leaf on the wind; watch how I soar."

Monday, August 18, 2008

Ravelympic Moment

[fanfare] DA-da-da DA-da-da DA-da DA-dl-aaaaa! [/fanfare]

Yarmando has performed strongly so far during the Ravelympics, rapidly progressing through the qualifying rounds of his event, "Work In Progress Wrestling." But he made a fatal error in judgment this evening which, even more than costing him the gold, could place him out of medal contention entirely.

Fans will know that Yarmando began training with Team Browncoat in early March. His commitment was spotty, but he seized the chance to enter Ravelympics and emerge a champion, with the Wash Sweater finally finished.

When the torch was lit, the body was already complete to the underarms, and the sleeves had barely begun. Yarmando chose to work the sleeves with a high degree of difficulty: knitting both sleeves at once. This would slow progress, but also insure that the sleeves were identical in construction, the rates of increase perfectly synchronized.

For extra style points, Yarmando had chosen to knit the sweater seamlessly in the round. Some of the judges are likely to subtract points from the authenticity of the finished object, but others will appreciate the adherence to traditions set by the great Elizabeth Zimmerman.

Sadly, Yarmando discovered that, for this particular design, Zimmerman's ingenious method of combining the sleeves with the upper body would clash with the established cables. Though it might appear to observers that he was showing strong progress, he was losing his form. After some soul-searching, he forfeited the latest round (the latest 8 rounds, in fact), losing an entire day's work.

Hope is not lost. Yarmando performed well in this event in the past, and so his fans and coaches know he has it in him. But is there time for him to change design direction before the Olympic torch is extinguished?

Wednesday, August 06, 2008

License Plate Time Again

Any day now, I should be getting my renewal notice from the DMV. We know that TOE UP is out of the question. My favorite contenders are these:

I'm most partial to MUWAHAA. I'd rather have MWAHAHA, but it wasn't available. BWAHAHA is available, but sounds more like I'm erupting in a guffaw than chuckling evilly.

Saturday, August 02, 2008

Get Mii

During my vacation in Maine last month, I was continually rewarded by spontaneity. One of us would suggest something random, we'd decide to do it, and it was great. So that's why, after a couple pomegranate martinis at dinner, I said, "Let's go to Target; I bet they have Wiis in stock." They did, and I bought one. At left is sort of what my Mii looks like, created using My Avatar Editor.

Mike tolerates the new toy, but I'm really enjoying it. My back and shoulders have a pleasant exercise-related ache. Bizarrely, I seem most to be enjoying the golf game. I really don't like golf (it's a "good walk spoiled," as Mark Twain probably never said.) In a week, I managed to get up to pro status.

Amazon wish list has become padded with Wii-lated loot. I'm ridiculously excited about Clone Wars for the Wii: light saber dueling!