Unbalanced

When I got the Wii, I knew I should also get the Wii Fit. I figured it would make a good Xmas present, so I put it on my wishlist. About a week ago, I realized that that was just a lame excuse to put off exercising until the end of the year.

The Wii Fit wonders why I don't fall down when I walk. I'm not kidding.

It calculates your Wii age based on your actual age, your BMI, and (at least in my case) your score in a couple balance tests. I'm terrible at the balance tests. I can't stop over-correcting when my balance indicator shifts out of the target position the game wants it to be. Yesterday I got lucky, and the random tests didn't ask me to shift my weight: only to stand perfectly still and to walk in place. My Wii age is 25, but I know it will spring back up to the mid-40's when I test it again.

Others have complained that the Fit's principle measurement of success is weight. My weight is pretty good; my BMI score is a click or two above ideal, but still within normal. Fit suggests I drop 15 pounds to get my BMI down to 22. After a couple days of resisting, I started actually trying, cutting out desserts, snacks, extra carbs.

Actual conversation that just happened: Mike walked into the room and said he was going to go pick up some donuts. "Do you want anything?"

"No, thanks. Well, maybe I should eat something."

"I'm going to Donut Kitchen."

"Oh, well, then nothing, thanks."

"Want me to stop at Krogers?"

"No."

"Tim Horton's?"

"No!"

"Dodger," Mike says, addressing the cat who is waiting for his morning dose of butter, "Daddy's being cranky."

Weightloss and domestic tranquility: it's going to be a tough balancing act.

Wash's Sweater Pattern

It's been quiet here because I've spent the weeks since the Olympics creating the pattern for Wash's Sweater.

Initially, I used Excel to create my adaptations of the cable pattern originally drafted by Maggs. I found great instructions for charting cables by Marnie MacLean. Results were satisfactory, but I wanted something better. I played with a few knitting fonts, and then shelled out the money for Knit Visualizer.

This program is awesome. Every stitch I needed was right there in the library. It took me almost no time at all to translate my work into Knit Visualizer. And the program can automatically generate a chart legend and text translation of each row.

I made my prototype sweater in the round, because that's what I do. But I could tell from screen caps that the actual sweater in the Firefly episodes was knit flat and seamed together, like Aran sweaters traditionally are. So working from my copy of Aran Knitting, I started drafting the pattern in Alice Starmore style, later revising toward a more Knitty.com style. Jeremy told me I should write up the pattern exactly as I did it, so when I was done with the flat version, I worked on a circular version. It's not exactly what I did: more like what I would do if I did it again.

I've spent the last week hammering away at the layout. This morning, I used PDF Online to convert my documents, and slapped together a quick homepage for the patterns.


I'd love to know what you think. Any suggestions for improving the instructions, charts, and layout, or offers to improve the graphics I've slapped together for the pattern and website are welcome.

Real Olympics

I've made good progress on the sweater this morning, so I thought I'd pause and offer these thoughts on the Real Olympics. I know we call them "the Olympic Games," but by and large "games" do not belong in the Olympic contests. I say these events must go:

• Badminton
• Baseball
• Basketball
• Beach Volleyball
• Boxing
• Fencing
• Football
• Handball
• Hockey
• Judo
• Softball
• Table Tennis
• Taekwondo
• Tennis
• Volleyball
• Water Polo
• Wrestling

Anything that is a direct match-up between two people or two teams is something other than the Olympics. (I know: you're going to fight me on Wrestling since it has tradition behind it. I don't care; it meets the "match-up" criteria, so it goes).

I also say we ditch "Equestrian" for a species violation. And we should lose Rhythmic Gymnastics because its stupid.

Final Rounds

The Olympic Torch will be doused at noon, Eastern Daylight Time, on Sunday. Coincidentally, I have to start work at that time, but I'm off today and tomorrow, which (barring accidents) should be plenty of time to finish my Ravelympics project.


What remains is to shape the front of the neck, join the shoulders, lengthen and attach the sleeves, and knit the collar. The first of these remaining tasks will be the trickiest for me. No pattern; just working from screen caps.

It probably would be bad luck at this time to say, "I am a leaf on the wind; watch how I soar."

Ravelympic Moment

[fanfare] DA-da-da DA-da-da DA-da DA-dl-aaaaa! [/fanfare]

Yarmando has performed strongly so far during the Ravelympics, rapidly progressing through the qualifying rounds of his event, "Work In Progress Wrestling." But he made a fatal error in judgment this evening which, even more than costing him the gold, could place him out of medal contention entirely.

Fans will know that Yarmando began training with Team Browncoat in early March. His commitment was spotty, but he seized the chance to enter Ravelympics and emerge a champion, with the Wash Sweater finally finished.

When the torch was lit, the body was already complete to the underarms, and the sleeves had barely begun. Yarmando chose to work the sleeves with a high degree of difficulty: knitting both sleeves at once. This would slow progress, but also insure that the sleeves were identical in construction, the rates of increase perfectly synchronized.


For extra style points, Yarmando had chosen to knit the sweater seamlessly in the round. Some of the judges are likely to subtract points from the authenticity of the finished object, but others will appreciate the adherence to traditions set by the great Elizabeth Zimmerman.

Sadly, Yarmando discovered that, for this particular design, Zimmerman's ingenious method of combining the sleeves with the upper body would clash with the established cables. Though it might appear to observers that he was showing strong progress, he was losing his form. After some soul-searching, he forfeited the latest round (the latest 8 rounds, in fact), losing an entire day's work.

Hope is not lost. Yarmando performed well in this event in the past, and so his fans and coaches know he has it in him. But is there time for him to change design direction before the Olympic torch is extinguished?

License Plate Time Again

Any day now, I should be getting my renewal notice from the DMV. We know that TOE UP is out of the question. My favorite contenders are these:


I'm most partial to MUWAHAA. I'd rather have MWAHAHA, but it wasn't available. BWAHAHA is available, but sounds more like I'm erupting in a guffaw than chuckling evilly.

Get Mii

During my vacation in Maine last month, I was continually rewarded by spontaneity. One of us would suggest something random, we'd decide to do it, and it was great. So that's why, after a couple pomegranate martinis at dinner, I said, "Let's go to Target; I bet they have Wiis in stock." They did, and I bought one. At left is sort of what my Mii looks like, created using My Avatar Editor.

Mike tolerates the new toy, but I'm really enjoying it. My back and shoulders have a pleasant exercise-related ache. Bizarrely, I seem most to be enjoying the golf game. I really don't like golf (it's a "good walk spoiled," as Mark Twain probably never said.) In a week, I managed to get up to pro status.

Amazon wish list has become padded with Wii-lated loot. I'm ridiculously excited about Clone Wars for the Wii: light saber dueling!

Copycat Spiral Yoke

Last year, I was out in Maine when BrooklynTweed posted photos of Cobblestone on his blog. I should have started knitting it immediately. Instead, I started knitting something else that I just had to frog in favor of the Cobblestone. His Spiral Yoke sweater looks intriguing, but I have my doubts. Still, I've learned my lesson:

Obey the Tweed.

I made my sister drive me to yarn stores in search of some worsted merino. I hit the jackpot at Purl Diva. Loki the shop dog was hopped up on dog treats and kept barking at me, but Ellen was great. She looked up the sweater on Ravelry, suggested good alternative yarns, and I found ample amounts.

I've started the project three times, trying to get the tubular cast-on right. Finally, I found TECHknitter's instructions. Easy to follow, quick, and with a beautiful result. I was so turned on by this cast-on that I....

Well, I better just stop there.


Thanks, Gerald, for the bit of Blimey that not only completed Mike's socks but provided a bright contrasting tail for the tubular cast-on.

I'll work on this until the Olympics start. I've joined Team Browncoat in Ravelympics, hoping to complete the Wash Sweater before the Olympic flame goes out on August 24.

Vacation Tweets

I don't use Twitter with my phone. If I did, this is probably what I would've tweeted in the past few days:

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Landed only 20 min late. Resolution: only carbs on this trip will be alcohol, breakfast, or frozen.
11:00 AM July 16, 2008 from txt

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Maine International Film Festival. http://asenseofwonderfilm.com
06:30 PM July 16, 2008 from txt

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If I had iPhone, I would look up voice actors for WALL-E.
01:30 PM July 17, 2008 from txt

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Buying handspun from Pine Tree Yarns in Damariscotta. Next: sit on rocks @ Pemaquid until I forget my name.
11:00 AM July 18, 2008 from txt

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Fresh mussels with linguini and house marinara @ Scarlet Begonia. Brownie batter & pnut butter cup @ Gelato Fiasco.
06:00 PM July 18, 2008 from txt

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LOL http://drhorrible.com -- "The hammer is my penis."
08:00 AM July 19, 2008 from txt

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I hate sewing

Two of my staff are having baby girls this summer (one could be giving birth at this very minute). I got a late start on knitting them some gifts, but managed to crank out two Baby Surprise Jackets pretty quickly -- at least the knitting part.

See, this is why I like socks: you bind off the cuff or graft the toe, and *poof*, you're done. These jackets require minimal sewing, but still required 10 inches of seam and 5 buttons each.

Nevertheless, they're done, and they are cute, aren't they?

Anti-Social Follow-Up

My last post doesn't make this clear: I'm not categorically against the social web. One of the things I love most about the Internet is how it creates communities of common interest. I'm also a fan of innovation and dabbling:

• I joined LibraryThing in November 2005, but it wasn't until I discovered the blog widget nearly a year later that I really started using it.
• I first tried Twitter in April 2007, but it was annoying and useless. This spring, after more people I actually know had joined, I reanimated my account, and have found that I've enjoyed the random messages from friends during the day.
• I created my del.icio.us account in December 2005. Intellectually, I know it's a good and useful service, but I'm still struggling to integrate it into my daily life.

And that last point is the one I seem to be struggling to make: judging these services based on whether they supplement or augment my life and enrich the pursuit of the interests I already have, rather than add random activities and on-line responsibilities. It's actually kind of cool that so many people I already know are on Facebook, and that when I joined, my network of these "friends" grew so rapidly. But Facebook doesn't integrate neatly into my life; instead it presents me with something else to do. That "something else" is certainly fun, but I feel somehow that I'm doing what Facebook wants me to do, not what I want to do.

Anti-Social

On June 25, I was criticized for not being on Facebook. So the next day I joined. And then the next day, I opened a FriendFeed account. And now I've got people pestering me to be on Plurk.

Enough already.

Initially, Facebook filled me with Third Grade anxieties -- "What if so-and-so won't be my friend?" Then came the Ninth Grade anxieties -- "Should I join groups? Are groups un-cool? What about flair? Is that cool? I don't want to be un-cool." Then it just settled down into lots of invitations to play games. I suck at Scramble. I hold my own at WordTwist. I dominate at Sudoku.

I have a blog because it was the easiest way to create a web-presence, and occasionally I do have something I want to say. I have LibraryThing and Ravelry because I like to keep track of what I read and knit. That seems to be about it.

So I'm instituting a new rule: no more social networking applications without a clear purpose and direct relevance to my life -- my first life, and its relevant on-line tools and extensions. I have no need to create a Second Life.

Blimey

Why do I keep forgetting that one skein of Glacier is not enough to knit a pair of men's socks?


Oh well. It's my last skein of the stuff. I won't have this particular problem again.

I made these using the heel method from Fleegle's pattern. I love this heel. It's beautiful and it's easy. I want to experiment to see if the fit is ruined by making the heel base a tad wider -- it's a little too pointy for my taste, but that's a minor quibble.

Not professional

Got very helpful response from XRX. They understand that it's a fuzzy definition and people can be confused. And they drew what is, in my opinion, a very clear and reasonable line:

A simple rule (that we think is fair) is that if you haven’t made more than $500 (a prize amount for aspecific amateur category in the Think Outside The SOX contest) then you are still an amateur. If you teach the occasional class here and there, you may or may not be considered an amateur – but that would really depend on how much you teach and how much money you've made from teaching. In most cases, we find that knitting and crochet instructors – paid to teach others – really are professionals; at least in the eyes of their students. Again… we try to use the $500 rule here as well.

I haven't made anywhere near $500. So I'm free to enter as an amateur.

Soon you will all tremble before the awesome spectacle of my evil sock designs.

Professional?

XRX is having a sock design context, Think Outside the SOX. I'm intrigued by a couple of the contest categories: Bearfoot's "Not Cuff Down," and Universal Yarn's "Most Masculine." (Shut up. My knitting is very butch.)

The hitch is that it's an amateur contest. The rules say, "If you are paid to knit or crochet, teach knitting or crochet, design knit or crochet garments, or sell yarn, you are defined as a professional." While I can't get into TNNA because I've never published a design, and in most cases I haven't earned enough money to pay for the gas I use driving to class, the truth is I have been paid to teach.

At the risk of sounding Clintonian, whether I'm a professional might depend on what your definitions of "are" are. On occasion, I have been paid to teach knitting, but this is an irregular thing; I do not think that I am paid to teach knitting.

What do you think? I accept that I'm an evil sock genius, but am I a professional evil sock genius?

Memed

Cat tagged me; I'm It.

1. What was I doing 10 years ago?

In 1998, my Ph.D. exams expired, and even if I'd wanted to write my dissertation, I would have had to retake the exams. I was even now on my second job since abandoning academia, working as the GHPL Technology Coordinator. It was the first summer reading club since 1992 that I hadn't created. Ten years ago this month Mike and I moved into our current place.

2. What are 5 things on my to-do list for today (not in any particular order):

• Take webinar on library uses for Flickr and Twitter
• Meet with Friends of the Library about book sale planning
• Be Dewey D. Chipmunk at summer reading kick-off in Powell
• Print syllabus for sock class that starts tomorrow
• Finish this model sock

3. Snacks I enjoy:

• Wavy Lays
• Pretzel Nuggets
• Ice Cream
• Popcorn with Parmesan cheese
  

4. Things I would do if I were a billionaire:

• Hire staff, especially financial manager
• Erase all debt in family (family defined broadly)
• Buy a home. Or two. A place in Manhattan, perhaps.
• Probably what others say they would do: establish foundation
  

5. Places I have lived:

• Ohio (Mt. Vernon, Kent, Columbus, Upper Arlington)
• Mérida

6. Peeps I want to know more about:

Sorry, this seed fell upon the rock, sprung up, and withered away because it has no moisture. But if the wind picks it up and finds root in your good ground, have at it.

Center-pull Ball Holder

I decided that I better work both sleeves of the Wash Sweater at once. That way, if I stall out again, I won't have to figure out how to make the second sleeve match the first: each decision I make I will make for both sleeves simultaneously so they'll match without any extra pain and effort.

I also decided to work from the inside and outside of a center-pull ball, so that the inconsistent dye jobs on the yarn will at least match sleeve to sleeve. But my yarn was tangling. After a couple attempts to mangle a wire hanger into shape, I came up with this:

Something heavier would probably work better to keep the whole thing place, but this does seem to be doing the job: the ball doesn't flip around, and I can keep the strands from winding around each other.

Wash Sweater, back on track?

I worked on the Wash Sweater for about a month, then stalled out two months ago, when it came time to plan the sleeves. Not that the sleeves will be hard, but some decisions are required, and whenever I tried to summon up the energy to make these decisions, I was struck by this stark fact:

I don't have enough yarn to finish.

I got the yarn from Mary who was stash-busting. She got it from Handpaintedyarn.com. When I started the project, there was no more to be found in this color ("Sea Foam," which you might
think would be green but actually is the dirty beige color that real sea foam tends to be). I thought I might try to find something close, then dye whole garment when it was finished. But even better: when I went to the site this morning, there were three skeins to be had.

So. Back at it. I've been keeping my planning notes in a Google document, which I just made public today, so you can follow along if you want.

Meanwhile, Dodger reminds me that, if I decide not to finish, he'd be perfectly happy to make use of the work-in-progress.

Andersson Heel

I have revised and moved my bibliography of toe-up sock construction methods, adding some patterns I've run across in the past year. As I was adding the Andersson Heel, I realized that because the instructions are so brief, I need to do some complicated figuring in order to adapt it when I make socks. I would find it easier to work from a chart, and so with Knitman's permission, I offer my version. (BTW: Knitman gave his permission, but not his endorsement. He was unable to make sense of my directions. It's very possible that I've got it wrong. So do check out his instructions here and here.)

Toe-Up Socks using the Andersson Heel

Start the socks using your favorite toe-up starting method, such as my Tornado Toe. Make your toe and begin knitting the foot.

After a few inches, count how many rows (or rounds) work out to an inch. Multiply that by two inches less the length of the foot this sock is meant to fit. Example, if your foot is 9 inches long, then you want 7 inches, and if you're getting 11 rounds per inch, then we're talking 77 rounds. Got it?

Now find your sock's stitch circumference on the chart below (column A). Subtract the number of designated gusset rounds from your total number of rounds (column C is a standard gusset; column D is for a longer, more tapered gusset). You now know how many rounds to knit before starting the gussets.

Sock Circumference (A)	Gusset Stitches (B)	Standard Gusset - increase alternate rounds (C)	Longer Gusset - increase every 3rd round (D)
28	6	12	18
32	6	12	18
36	7	14	21
40	8	16	24
44	8	16	24
48	9	18	27
52	10	20	30
56	10	20	30
60	11	22	33
64	12	24	36
68	12	24	36
72	13	26	38
76	14	28	42
80	14	28	42

Back to the example: if your sock is 60 stitches in circumference, your target is 77 rounds, and you want the longer, more tapered gusset, you would subtract 33 from 77: you'll knit 44 rounds from your cast-on point before starting the gussets.

Decide which side of your sock is the sole and which is the instep or top. When you reach the round where your gussets begin, increase on either side of sole: knit 1, make 1, knit across sole until 1 stitch remains, make 1, knit 1.

Knit one or two plain rounds after the increase round, depending on whether you chose the standard or longer gusset numbers from the chart.

Repeat increase and plain rounds until you have added on each side of the sole the number of gusset stitches designated for your circumference (column B in the chart).

The Heel

Knit across the sole, stopping B+1 stitches before the end. (If you added 11 gusset stitches to each side of the sole, you will knit across the sole until 12 stitches remain). SSK, and turn.

Sl1, then purl across sole until B+1 stitches remain. P2tog. Turn.

Sl1, then knit until 1 stitch before the gap. SSK. Turn.

Sl1, then purl until 1 stitch before the gap. P2tog. Turn.

Repeat these last two rows until 2 stitches remain beyond the gap. After the SSK that leaves one stitch, do not turn. Resume knitting in the round, across the instep. When you return to the sole (now "back of heel") side, K1, K2tog, and resume knitting plain.

Knit the leg using whatever ribbing or pattern you choose, and bind-off loosely at the top.

Yarmando.com debuts

As a Xmas present to myself a while back, I bought yarmando.com. I couldn't find a way to easily make it the home for this blog, so I've just let it be. Until now.

The Evil Genius Sock Pattern is ready to be unleashed on the world. I was going to put the files up where I normally do (the bit of space afforded me by my ISP), but thought I'd have a go at finally putting some content up on my own domain. After a bit of tinkering Monday morning, I had a basic site built (using Google Page Creator) and my new sock pattern uploaded.

I'll gradually add more content, and periodically get inspired to make the whole thing look better. But meanwhile, you're welcome to click on over to Yarmando's Laboratory, Lair of the Evil Sock Genius. And let me know what you think of the Evil Genius Lessons.