Memed

Cat tagged me; I'm It.

1. What was I doing 10 years ago?

In 1998, my Ph.D. exams expired, and even if I'd wanted to write my dissertation, I would have had to retake the exams. I was even now on my second job since abandoning academia, working as the GHPL Technology Coordinator. It was the first summer reading club since 1992 that I hadn't created. Ten years ago this month Mike and I moved into our current place.

2. What are 5 things on my to-do list for today (not in any particular order):

• Take webinar on library uses for Flickr and Twitter
• Meet with Friends of the Library about book sale planning
• Be Dewey D. Chipmunk at summer reading kick-off in Powell
• Print syllabus for sock class that starts tomorrow
• Finish this model sock

3. Snacks I enjoy:

• Wavy Lays
• Pretzel Nuggets
• Ice Cream
• Popcorn with Parmesan cheese
  

4. Things I would do if I were a billionaire:

• Hire staff, especially financial manager
• Erase all debt in family (family defined broadly)
• Buy a home. Or two. A place in Manhattan, perhaps.
• Probably what others say they would do: establish foundation
  

5. Places I have lived:

• Ohio (Mt. Vernon, Kent, Columbus, Upper Arlington)
• Mérida

6. Peeps I want to know more about:

Sorry, this seed fell upon the rock, sprung up, and withered away because it has no moisture. But if the wind picks it up and finds root in your good ground, have at it.

Center-pull Ball Holder

I decided that I better work both sleeves of the Wash Sweater at once. That way, if I stall out again, I won't have to figure out how to make the second sleeve match the first: each decision I make I will make for both sleeves simultaneously so they'll match without any extra pain and effort.

I also decided to work from the inside and outside of a center-pull ball, so that the inconsistent dye jobs on the yarn will at least match sleeve to sleeve. But my yarn was tangling. After a couple attempts to mangle a wire hanger into shape, I came up with this:

Something heavier would probably work better to keep the whole thing place, but this does seem to be doing the job: the ball doesn't flip around, and I can keep the strands from winding around each other.

Wash Sweater, back on track?

I worked on the Wash Sweater for about a month, then stalled out two months ago, when it came time to plan the sleeves. Not that the sleeves will be hard, but some decisions are required, and whenever I tried to summon up the energy to make these decisions, I was struck by this stark fact:

I don't have enough yarn to finish.

I got the yarn from Mary who was stash-busting. She got it from Handpaintedyarn.com. When I started the project, there was no more to be found in this color ("Sea Foam," which you might
think would be green but actually is the dirty beige color that real sea foam tends to be). I thought I might try to find something close, then dye whole garment when it was finished. But even better: when I went to the site this morning, there were three skeins to be had.

So. Back at it. I've been keeping my planning notes in a Google document, which I just made public today, so you can follow along if you want.

Meanwhile, Dodger reminds me that, if I decide not to finish, he'd be perfectly happy to make use of the work-in-progress.

Andersson Heel

I have revised and moved my bibliography of toe-up sock construction methods, adding some patterns I've run across in the past year. As I was adding the Andersson Heel, I realized that because the instructions are so brief, I need to do some complicated figuring in order to adapt it when I make socks. I would find it easier to work from a chart, and so with Knitman's permission, I offer my version. (BTW: Knitman gave his permission, but not his endorsement. He was unable to make sense of my directions. It's very possible that I've got it wrong. So do check out his instructions here and here.)

Toe-Up Socks using the Andersson Heel

Start the socks using your favorite toe-up starting method, such as my Tornado Toe. Make your toe and begin knitting the foot.

After a few inches, count how many rows (or rounds) work out to an inch. Multiply that by two inches less the length of the foot this sock is meant to fit. Example, if your foot is 9 inches long, then you want 7 inches, and if you're getting 11 rounds per inch, then we're talking 77 rounds. Got it?

Now find your sock's stitch circumference on the chart below (column A). Subtract the number of designated gusset rounds from your total number of rounds (column C is a standard gusset; column D is for a longer, more tapered gusset). You now know how many rounds to knit before starting the gussets.

Sock Circumference (A)	Gusset Stitches (B)	Standard Gusset - increase alternate rounds (C)	Longer Gusset - increase every 3rd round (D)
28	6	12	18
32	6	12	18
36	7	14	21
40	8	16	24
44	8	16	24
48	9	18	27
52	10	20	30
56	10	20	30
60	11	22	33
64	12	24	36
68	12	24	36
72	13	26	38
76	14	28	42
80	14	28	42

Back to the example: if your sock is 60 stitches in circumference, your target is 77 rounds, and you want the longer, more tapered gusset, you would subtract 33 from 77: you'll knit 44 rounds from your cast-on point before starting the gussets.

Decide which side of your sock is the sole and which is the instep or top. When you reach the round where your gussets begin, increase on either side of sole: knit 1, make 1, knit across sole until 1 stitch remains, make 1, knit 1.

Knit one or two plain rounds after the increase round, depending on whether you chose the standard or longer gusset numbers from the chart.

Repeat increase and plain rounds until you have added on each side of the sole the number of gusset stitches designated for your circumference (column B in the chart).

The Heel

Knit across the sole, stopping B+1 stitches before the end. (If you added 11 gusset stitches to each side of the sole, you will knit across the sole until 12 stitches remain). SSK, and turn.

Sl1, then purl across sole until B+1 stitches remain. P2tog. Turn.

Sl1, then knit until 1 stitch before the gap. SSK. Turn.

Sl1, then purl until 1 stitch before the gap. P2tog. Turn.

Repeat these last two rows until 2 stitches remain beyond the gap. After the SSK that leaves one stitch, do not turn. Resume knitting in the round, across the instep. When you return to the sole (now "back of heel") side, K1, K2tog, and resume knitting plain.

Knit the leg using whatever ribbing or pattern you choose, and bind-off loosely at the top.

Yarmando.com debuts

As a Xmas present to myself a while back, I bought yarmando.com. I couldn't find a way to easily make it the home for this blog, so I've just let it be. Until now.

The Evil Genius Sock Pattern is ready to be unleashed on the world. I was going to put the files up where I normally do (the bit of space afforded me by my ISP), but thought I'd have a go at finally putting some content up on my own domain. After a bit of tinkering Monday morning, I had a basic site built (using Google Page Creator) and my new sock pattern uploaded.

I'll gradually add more content, and periodically get inspired to make the whole thing look better. But meanwhile, you're welcome to click on over to Yarmando's Laboratory, Lair of the Evil Sock Genius. And let me know what you think of the Evil Genius Lessons.

Koolhaas for M

A friend has begun losing her hair during chemotherapy, so I decided it was time to put aside my obsession with evil and use my knitting powers for good.

Presenting Jared Flood's Koolhaas Hat in Rowan All Season Cotton. I loved it when I saw it on Jared's blog, but since I'd just knit three things after seeing him knit them first, I decided I needed to stop being a copycat. But when I found out M. needed a hat, this immediately leaped to mind. And it's even library-related, based on the windows at the Seattle Public Library.

Today is Columbus's Komen Race for the Cure. Maybe next year I'll be in shape for it. But meanwhile, I'll make a donation and encourage everyone to do the same.

Random bizarre thought: cancer drug companies should underwrite free mammograms since they create demand for their product.

Evil takes new direction

Big thanks to the underlings who voted in my poll.

• 8% said it was better for smaller socks to be looser, relative to bigger socks
• 16% said the opposite was true, and smaller socks should be relatively tighter.
• 76% picked the obviously correct answer, which is that "tightness" is a variable that doesn't correlate with size.

But while you were distracted with these trivialities, I have put my genius to work and discovered new resources of sock-based evil.

The question, minions, is not how much bigger must you make a sock to accommodate the heel. Imagine that you begin with the knowledge of the circumference of heel and instep, and from there calculate how much smaller the sock should be to fit the foot and toes?

Muwah-ha-ha-ha-ha-haaa!

Jane Chord

From Slog, I learned this week about the Jane Chord: combine the first and last words of a book into a two-word sentence which just might reveal something interesting about the book. One description of the method says to skip articles when constructing the chord.

The book I'm currently reading, Declare by Tim Powers: "Young Day." (Or "Telephone River" if you skip the prologue and afterword).

The new Jim Butcher book on my bedside shelf: "Winter too."

Simple Socks, Plain and Fancy: "Socks repertoire."

The Golden Compass: "Lyra sky."

The Great Gatsby: "In past."

Last year, I noticed a trend among librarians to designate in their email signatures what they're currently reading. I've started doing that in my work account. I've noticed that it causes me to leave my signature block in place, rather than deleting it and signing with my initials, as I normally do for internal/informal mail. Give it a try. And go read this inspiring, passionate essay about the wonders and importance of reading.

Design opinions needed

The Evil Sock Genius pattern is nearly complete. (They all laughed at me, but soon...soon...I will have my revenge).

I need one more element before I begin to unleash my weapon on an unsuspecting world: the world's opinion. So I've put a poll up on the blog -------------------------------->

It's really all about stitch circumference. Do you think it's better for socks with a smaller stitch circumference to be a bit looser or a bit tighter, relative to socks with a larger stitch circumference?

My general rule is that all socks should err on the side of "tighter." But see, I'm building a reference chart that is the base of my pattern, and the references I'm consulting -- while they agree on the fit of socks in the mid-range (48 - 60 stitches around), one reference makes socks with less than 48 stitches slightly looser, and one makes it slightly tighter.

Which do you think is best? Take my poll. (And seal your doom).

It's like my body is crying

Because I worked a 13-hour day yesterday and have a program tonight, I took this morning off. I decided a little exercise would make me feel better about myself. (I saw myself on TV last week. The camera adds 15 pounds. Being next to Anietra Hamper adds at least another 15). I have a DVD from Netflix of 10-minute fitness ball workouts, so I thought I'd give one of those a try.

Pathetic.

Back at the computer, I ran across today's Penny Arcade cartoon which was funny and timely.

Evil Sock Genius at work; updates later

Sorry I haven't posted for so long. I've got a huge thing gearing up at work. When I'm not at work, I'm striving to make the rest of my life as relaxing and uninteresting as possible.

Not much blog-worthy going on with the knitting. Working on an adorable pair of socks, but I can't post a photo because it's a gift. In fact, I've entered Spring Birthday Season, so there are a couple gift socks in progress. Still in search of the Perfect Sock Pattern, I bought a copy of Stitch Stud's Design Your Own Toe Up Sock tutorial. It involves a lot of math up front to determine circumference, gusset increases, heel base, ankle panels, etc. I'm eager to see if it works.

Meanwhile, I'm working on a new pattern of my own: the Evil Genius Socks. It's the next evolutionary stage of the Yarmando Mash-Up Sock, incorporating the Just Start Knitting toe, the improved You're Putting Me On heel, and some intriguing ideas about calculating the sock length.

Finally, the Wash Sweater is languishing at the point that all my sweaters get stuck at: the body is finished up to the armpits, and it's time to start the sleeves. I hate knitting sleeves. It's like you're knitting socks but without the interesting parts.

Green for St. Patrick's Day

Happy St. Patrick's Day! In celebration, I'm wearing the Enormous Green Thing to work (with a baseball jersey underneath, because the Green Thing is itchy).

I am a leaf on the wind

There's a Ravelry group for Firefly/Serenity fans, and of course I belong to it. It's longest thread is "The real Firefly knitting challenge," a discussion about a particular Aran sweater worn by my favorite character in a couple episodes.

Ravelers KnottyLa and Maggs have done some amazing pioneering work to replicate the cables. I was dying to get started on this, especially now that the tweed pullover is done, so I grabbed yarn and needles and tried my hand at cable design.

This was some serious fun. I love cables. Mom taught me how to cross stitches for a cable before she taught me how to purl.

I've done lots of cables, but I'd never tried to replicate something from pictures, building the design stitch-by-stitch, row-by-row. I was pretty proud of myself, then Maggs put out her charts, and I realized that I'd made the cables too thin -- they should be three stitches wide instead of the two I used.

I decided it was time to jump in. I've got gauge (4 sts/in) and I've got a general idea where I'm going. So I cast-on and started the ribbing.

And because the outside looks like this today, I've got plenty of time to make some progress.

(Note: ordinarily, there would be a street in this picture).

Tweed Pullover

I finished the tweed pullover.

The bottom is a little wrinkly from the drive to where the photoshoot took place. Special thanks to JKLsemi for the pictures. (Portraits aren't really her thing; check out the pictures she took today that are more typical of her work).

I want to reblock the sweater. As expected, the ribbing pulled it in pretty snuggly, so I had to stretch it out, but now the bottom flairs more than I'd like. It's also just a tad too short. But I'm picking at it; friends have told me they think it's the best I've done so far.

I bought feet

In the excitement of all the cleaning, I forgot to mention these:


Yep, I bought feet. Lately, all the socks I've been making have looked misshapen when photographed on flat sock blockers, so I decided I needed a mannequin foot. Eventually, I discovered that the correct term is "hosiery form," and I found an eBay store that carried them. I bought the women's form (on the left) first, and then decided to get I needed the men's form as well.

Here's the form in action, displaying my current sock in progress: "Fountain Foxglove" from New Pathways, with an eye-of-partridge heel.

These were promised to my boss at Christmas, so I need to get cranking on them. But I've been distracted by progress on the tweed pullover. I finished the second sleeve and connected the sleeves to the body yesterday.

My plan is to continue that stripe of ribbing up the sleeves and over the shoulder. I'm pretty sure I'll have to block the ribbing out flat or the sweater will be too tight, but it's going to be sharp when it's done.

February New Gadget Lust

There seems to be something about this season that makes me want new electronics. I'm guessing it has something to do with Christmas toys losing their shininess, and with income tax refunds waiving at me from my checking account.

I should be focused on buying a schmancy TV and an up-converting DVD player, but what I really want is a new phone. I want something iPhone-like, perhaps even an actual iPhone.

I want ubiquitous, convenient, handheld web access. I want to check my email from my phone; in particular, I would like to be able to use mobile Gmail, but the app doesn't run on Verizon devices. That just makes me want to abandon Verizon, but to do that, I would also have to move Mike and Nancy.

Someone send me the answer, please. Thanks.

Cleaning Sabbatical - The Wrap Up

"Sabbatical" implies rest, a sabbath. Clearly, last week wasn't restful. I thought of it more like the sabbaticals afforded to professors: a break from the usual work to work on something else.

Though not restful, my cleaning sabbatical was satisfying. The study and basement in particular feel less oppressive now that floor space has been cleared of junk.

The cleaning project really isn't finished, but I think I managed to start something and get some momentum that will carry us through what is usually called "spring cleaning." I intend to keep a bookcase devoted to discards; I am fond of systematic approaches to problems, and while there are systems in place for getting books and media into our home, we haven't to this point had a systematic way of getting them out.

So, to my readers, thanks for putting up with the tiresome details of this little adventure. And thanks especially to Mike, who only got visibly cranky with me twice during all of this. That's monumental. The first time he was ever really mad at me was when I moved his stuff, and I expected this last week to be a living hell of domestic strife. But I worked hard to keep the disruption to a minimum : every day, an hour before Mike got off work, I stopped what I was doing and began putting things away. Mike put up with it all, and I'm grateful.

Now, honey, could you sort through the remaining video cassettes and clean out the mess under your side of the desk?

Cleaning Sabbatical - Day Six

A lot more progress in the basement, but if I only did 1/3 Tuesday, I don' t know how I thought I could make up the other 2/3 on Wednesday.

I should drop it. Be satisfied with what I've done, and either give myself a day of rest or see what I can do on the unfinished side of the basement. But the work I've done these past two days feels less like cleaning and more like reclaiming an extra room in the house, so I'm going to keep plugging away.

Today I moved out of my way all the books and media that yesterday we decided to get rid of. (Most of it is packed into my car, or lining the stairs up to the main floor awaiting transport). That cleared off the new bookcase. I assembled the second bookcase, and moved them both into a corner beneath the stairs, where they currently hold the VHS collection, now ready for a deep weeding.

I cleaned out the antique post office desk that I inherited from my grandmother, and I sorted and stored my yarn stash. (Enough with the sock yarn, Donald).

My biggest accomplishment of the day was dealing with the remains of Mike's last job: adjunct writing instructor for Capital University. When he was unceremoniously booted from his position, he cleared out his office spaces and dropped it all in a corner of the basement. It was terribly painful for him, so I understood why he packed quickly and couldn't face sorting through it. I tossed the trash, consolidated the office supplies (none stolen; all purchased by Mike), and organized the rest for Mike's easy judgment.

That freed up some wall-adjacent floor space, so I shifted bookcases into a better arrangement, filled them with stuff, and reorganized our game shelves. Counting various Trivial Pursuit supplements, we have 47 games, including 7 types of "Scene It." Next month's Game Night is at our house; I'm excited that, for the first time ever, I can let guests into the basement to see the full game collection.

Like hope, but different

My inner cynic has been disgusted by how moved I am by will.i.am's Obama song and video. "Dude," says the cynic, "have you no defenses against cheap sentimentality anymore?"

Apparently not.

So I set off looking for parodies. This one cracked me up. More homage than parody, picking on McCain instead of Obama, but it's funny. Check it out.

I'm loving this Viral Video Chart site.

Cleaning Sabbatical - Day Five

I would be the most content if my children grew up to be the kind of people who think decorating consists mostly of building enough bookshelves.”

(Anna Quindlen, "Enough Bookshelves," The New York Times, August 7, 1991)

Our basement poses some particular challenges. Cleaning it involves sorting through books and movies that we no longer want. Plus, Mike is part of that "we," and he is on record as an official conscientious objector to my War on Clutter. Actually, he's been swell this whole week, but if I want his cooperation, I need to make it easy on him.

I have long maintained that we have plenty of bookcases. A quick count of individual shelves, not counting the ones devoted to holding CD's, and mentally averaging out long and short shelves:

• 33 shelves upstairs
• 15 shelves on the main floor
• 64 shelves in the basement

We have a bookcase and a half double-shelved with VHS tapes. This is why I say we don't need more shelves; we just need to get rid of the extra stuff.

But I needed to start somewhere, and this idea occurred to me: a new bookcase would provide a staging area to help us get rid of stuff. So I tooled up to Big Lots, bought two bookcases, drilled one together and filled it with the books and VHS tapes. I stuck a note on it, saying, "Keep anything, but move it to book cart." (I have an old, wooden library shelving cart because I'm a geek and because a previous employer, inexplicably, wanted to sell it cheap. It's much older and junkier -- but more authentic-looking -- than the one pictured here).

I stacked every homemade VHS tape on the floor for Mike's review, and I put every taped movie that we also own on DVD into bags for the library book sale. I alphabetized all the DVD's that are downstairs, then did the trick that Mike and I have found works well for cooperative weeding: I push in everything I want to keep. He will push in everything he wants to keep. What's left sticking out is given to a library.

All this got me about a third finished with this room, so I decided to suspend my rules. I know I said each room gets only a day; but with another day, I can make some fantastic progress in the basement.

Cleaning Sabbatical - Day Four

I found it enormously satisfying to unplug the computer, wrestle it out from under the desk, pop the cover, and blow three years of dust out. Best of all, when I put it all back together and turned it on, it worked. And it's quiet.

There were a lot of dead and out-dated electronics hanging around in the study, which was the target of Day Four. At the end of a very long day, the dead things have been pitched, the salvageable things have been given to people who can use them, and the useful things have been stowed. Old diskettes have been tossed, old financial records shredded, old clothes and small appliances donated to Goodwill.

Beneath the desk, I found a matted but unframed print (pictured left) that Mike bought at the Arts Festival a few years back. Since all this cleaning is upsetting his world (not to mention kicking allergens into the air), I brought it to the neighborhood frame store as a peace offering.

I told Mike I'd hang it if he would sort through some books and clean up two of the places where he's been piling stuff.

Friends, I am beat. I should start tackling the basement on Day Five, but I'm not sure I'm up to it.

Cleaning Sabbatical - Day Three

I'm losing steam. To say that I "worked" in the living room is to stretch the definition of "work." I moved dirty mugs to the dish washer. I threw socks into the laundry. There were a few Christmas decorations that I think Mike was hoping would become permanent decorative fixtures. I put them away, as I did with a few straggling holiday CD's that were sitting out. I made a half-hearted pass with a Swiffer duster and ran the vacuum cleaner.

In short, I redd up the room. Still, these efforts made a more visible impact than the work I did yesterday in the bedroom.

There was one achievement, however. Tucked between "my" side of the couch and the wall are my knitting tools and works in progress. I pulled all that out of there and sorted it. When it was all untangled, I found three projects (a pair of socks, a scarf, and a toy) about 80% done.

Hope makes me cry

Just in case, like me, you haven't yet contributed to the 4 million times this has been watched.

"There has never been anything false about hope."

Cleaning Sabbatical - Day Two

JoVE asked, "Is someone's mother coming to visit?"

Ha! No. Most of the areas I'm targeting are not visitor areas -- bedroom, basement, study. Even so, Mike's mom is blind, so she couldn't tell. My mom probably regrets instilling in me the carpe diem attitude that makes me choose to live my life rather than spend it cleaning.

Yes, sitting on my ass watching game shows qualifies as "living my life." Shut up.

One way of looking at all this effort: I'm cleaning so that Mike and I can find space to put more shit.

Day Two: The Bedroom.

This didn't take too long; in fact, I took a long break in the afternoon to go see a movie. Cleaning the bedroom mostly involved dusting. I pulled about a hundred books that we'll donate to our libraries, then spent the rest of my time dusting the book cases and the remaining books. I wiped dust off the walls and doors, off the vertical blinds, off the ceiling fan. I vacuumed behind dressers and under the futon. We sleep with a fan running, and I took that outside with a can of compressed air to blow the dust from that as well.

It's no wonder that all of us -- me, Mike and Dodger -- have sinus problems.

I'm very excited because while re-folding the sweaters stacked on top my dresser, I found my missing watch.

Cleaning Sabbatical - Day One

As a couple, Mike and I can most politely be described as "untidy." Our home is dusty and cluttered. It's not dangerously unsanitary, and there are no ominous smells, but if cleanliness is next to godliness, it's pretty clear that we're infidels.

So I have taken a week off work, starting today, to clean. Each day is devoted to one room, so not all rooms will get attention. And some rooms (like the two in the basement) need more than a day, but one day is all they'll get.

For the first day, I decided to stretch the definition of "room" to include my car. It's time for the 60,000 mile service, plus vacuuming, dusting, polishing the windows, and cleaning out the trunk.

Oops, I suddenly remembered that I forgot to vacuum the trunk (there are pine needles in there; I'm not quite sure how that happened). Will have to get to that on Saturday.

Partisan, political message

I'm going all liberal for a moment. International and conservative readers and those of you who have already voted or caucused should just move along.

In the general election, I will doubtlessly be supporting Dolores, but for the primary, I seem to be following demographic expectations and supporting Obama.

I like Senator Clinton; I always have. But I fear that she is unelectable as a Presidential candidate. Conservatives of all varieties loathe her. I never understood this Clinton-hating until I experienced similar feelings for our current President.

Think about that: much of the country hates Hillary Clinton as much as you hate George W. Bush. They will put aside their differences and unite behind any candidate that is not her, leaving us another Republican President to make Supreme Court appointments.

What's weird to me is, if I know this, why doesn't she? She's smarter than I am.

Look, policy-wise, there's very little discernible difference between Clinton and Obama.* Therefore, we need to nominate the candidate who can win. And speaking from my blue household in a red precinct of a blue city in a red state, I'm telling you that winner is not Clinton.

* In truth, I score highest with Clinton on Candidate Match.

Score!

Hey, yesterday was my blogiversary! My very first real blog post was about a scarf I was making from Blithe baby camel yarn, but I didn't tell the story of finding that yarn.

I was in Salem, Mass. for a work thing, and I had the afternoon free. I fired up my laptop, connected to my hotel's free wireless, searched for yarn shops in town, discovered Arbella Yarns, and looked up directions to walk there from my hotel. The shop didn't disappoint. I'm easily attracted to funky fibers, and yarn made from baby camels? Gotta get me some of that.

Expensive stuff, and a total pain to wind into balls, but it made a gorgeous scarf.

Today, while picking through the carcass of the late and lamented "Stitch Stops Here" yarn shop, I found a box of the Blithe baby camel yarn at 60% off. It's mine now.


Fourteen skeins, in colorways brown (5 skeins), straw (7), and cinnamon (2). Anyone have any good suggestions what I can make out of it?

Frazz

February 1990 was a very frustrating part of my life. My wheels were spinning. My Master's thesis was overdue but stalled, and it was blocking me from moving on in my studies. Although I lived with two other grad school guys, I felt lonelier than when I lived alone (loneliness without solitude). I was certainly on the point of admitting I was gay, but I had no idea how to begin to come out. And it was February in Ohio. Bleah.

Late in the month, an otherwise unremarkable "Calvin & Hobbes" cartoon was published with a panel that spoke directly to me. I cut it out and stuck it to my monitor. I've carried from job to job an enlarged but abridged version: "Why do things have to be this way? Why can't things be different?"

Periodically, I have a pang of grief over how much I miss "Calvin & Hobbes." When this happens, I might re-read all the books, troll the web for news and nostalgia, or change my IM avatar to that little picture of Calvin throwing an existential temper tantrum.

On one such occasion, I read that a comic called Frazz had a similar visual style, and I've been reading it ever since. I encourage you to check it out. I really liked today's comic. It's smart, and expects a lot out of the reader, referencing this classic Charles Addams piece.

My contributions to the bacterial apocalypse

Exactly two weeks ago, I came down with a cold. Sore throat, headache, cough. So that I wouldn't keep Mike awake, I slept on the couch. I took Friday off sick from work. Better Saturday, but worse Sunday. I tried to go into work on Monday, but went home after half a day. Feeling worse, I took Tuesday off too.

Wednesday I went to UrgentCare for them to confirm that it really was just a cold. Doctor said it probably was, but if I wasn't getting better in a few days, get a Z-Pak prescription filled. Also, here's some cough syrup with codeine. Increasingly miserable, I slept in the bed and Mike gallantly took the couch.

Thursday morning my eyelid was matted shut with pus from conjunctivitis. I took another day off.

Friday morning, I had an appointment to get blood drawn at my doctor's office. As soon as that was done, I passed out. (Well...almost. It was touch and go). After the dizziness and nausea passed, I elected to take yet another day off work. I stopped at the pharmacy on the way home, and started taking the antibiotics. That night, I finally began feeling better.

Did I need the antibiotics? Probably not. The whole thing was probably viral, and I've just helped create more drug-resistant bacteria.

The coda to this tale of antibiotic abuse: this week, I took Dodger to the vet because he has recurring upper respiratory infections. His doctor has put him on antibiotics too, probably long term.

A few things I learned over the course of this:

• Even though DayQuil, TheraFlu, and such medicines no longer have pseudoephedrine in theme, you can easily replicate the effects by taking the old active ingredients directly: Sudafed, Tylenol, Robitussin DM. At night, add some Benadryl.
• Robitussin started to make me sick, so I switched to vodka, which worked better.
• It's enormously comforting to pop in a DVD of a television series and just select "Play All." In this way, I've watch two seasons of Arrested Development and reacquainted myself with Firefly and Wonderfalls.
  

New Years Knitting

I began 2007 by casting on for a New Year Sweater, which I think makes a great tradition. Here's the 2008 New Year Sweater in progress:


It's another seamless hybrid pullover. I'm using Plymouth Tweed yarn. Once again, inspired by Brooklyn Tweed, I'm adding some accent ribbing on the sides. I think I'll rib the top of the sleeves too.

In sock news, the theme for January is pink, a color my mom had specifically requested. I had some pink/blue/purple striped cotton Sockotta in my stash, so I cranked out these.

I decided to try following the Queen Kahuna method to the letter. Pretty good results. Mom likes them, but they're not sufficiently pink, so she bought me a skein of Sea Wool, a blend of merino and Seacell.


I'm using the Coriolis pattern from New Pathways, and it's going very well. Love the yarn, love the needles (a new set of KnitPicks), love the pattern. The trick for me is to remember that both Queen Kahuna and Cat Bordhi socks will get 50% bigger, so I need to plan for that and start them a bit smaller than I would for Simple Socks with short-row heels.

Staple Free

Back in 1990, I stumbled upon a fun store in San Francisco that specialized in products for the newly revitalized ecology movement. (Remember 50 Simple Things You Can Do to Save the Earth?) I bought a reusable linen coffee filter -- for years, I drank coffee that tasted like a t-shirt -- and a set of paper stencils and glow-in-the-dark paint to put an astronomically accurate map of the night sky on my ceiling. The store also had a really cool paper fastener, which punched and folded tabs on your papers to hold them together without staples. I was a grad student and the stencil was setting me back $25, so I didn't buy one. But then later, when I had money, I couldn't find one.

Then last weekend, I found this as in impulse item while waiting in line at the Container Store. I bought two. It only fastens 5 sheets of paper, but it's just so cool. It punches a little tab and slit in your paper, folds the tab back, and tucks it into the slit. Other models are available at the manufacturer, Made By Humans.

2007 in review

Knitting
My best guess is that I knit 17 pairs of socks in 2007 (and the 3 single socks pictured here which probably will not get mates). While that's fewer than in 2006, they show a lot of experimentation. I figured out how to add gussets to improve the fit of short-row socks, and I worked out a modification that I really like for Judy Gibson's You're Putting Me On socks. I find myself turning more and more often to Bordhi and Beattie's books for inspiration. And ever since Mel wrote those bang-up instructions for the Sherman Heel, my devotion to the Priscilla Gibson-Roberts method has ebbed.

More notably, I made two successful sweaters: the red, seamless hybrid EPS and the green Cobblestone. And this is the year that I finally began to build a stash. (Damn you, Knitters' Market).

Books
I read 48 books last year, a 65% improvement over last year. That's still far from my high point in 1999, when I recorded 92 books for the year (I learned to knit Thanksgiving 1999; the drop-off in reading has a clear explanation). The combination of working around books again and the continued presence of the LibraryThing widget shaming me from over there on the right keeps my numbers high. Still, they'd be higher if it weren't for knitting, Sudoku/Kakuro, and the Nintendo DS.

Notables:

• Two delightful novels from Michael Chabon. My affection for Yiddish Policemen's Union has faded over the months, but that only means I'll enjoy re-reading sometime.
• A close second for the best book I read last year is The Astonishing Life of Octavian Nothing, Traitor to the Nation, Vol. 1: The Pox Party by M. T. Anderson.
  
• A few fantastic graphic novels: Pride of Baghdad, American Born Chinese, and The Plot. All three of these I re-read immediately upon finishing them.
• Best audiobook I listened to this year was Acceleration, although right now I'm listening to The Book Thief, and it's even better.
• A good pairing: I read Hero at the same time I was listening to Evil Genius.
• Some things I gave 4 stars to in my LibraryThing ratings are among my favorites from the year: Arthur Phillips' Angelica, Reza Aslan's No god but God, and Kenneth Oppel's Skybreaker. Skybreaker is one of several good sequels/series entries I caught this year.
  

Movies
I saw 23 movies in theaters last year. My favorites were:

• Breach. I love me some Laura Linney.
  
• Grindhouse. Mike and I argued for weeks. He said the Quentin Tarantino half was better; I argued that there is no such thing as "half." But he was right.
• Ratatouille. I love Brad Bird's work. Iron Giant is one of my favorite films. Bird's themes tread a thin path through Ayn Rand territory, but he makes it work for me.
• No Country for Old Men. The story arc is flawed and unsatisfying, but the Coen brothers are at that the top of their game. They play the tension in a scene like it's a piece of music. It's just a shame that that tension has nowhere to go.
• I saw one movie in a theater twice: The Simpsons Movie.
  

My best theater experiences of the year were for the Vamp and Camp Double Feature of "Cobra Woman" and "She Done Him Wrong," and for the documentary ShowBusiness: The Road to Broadway. The double feature was held in the crowded Ohio Theater, while "ShowBusiness" was shown at the Frontier Cafe, in a small, digital theater that my sister and I had all to ourselves.

New Shoes

This morning, I learned that Converse is making clear Chuck Taylors. So while picking up a few last items at the mall today, I ducked into Journeys and snagged me a pair.


Still playing with my lacing strategy, trying to obscure as little of the sock as possible. But clearly [sic] I have found an excuse to knit more socks for me me me.

If you've got a heart, then Gumby's a part of you

For two days this week, I actually listened to something on the radio besides NPR. A local station was broadcasting TV show theme songs.

It was amazing. Avengers, Dark Shadows, Facts of Life, Peter Gunn, Attack of the Killer Tomatoes, Davy Crockett, Soap, Hawaiian Eye. There were songs I completely didn't recognize, songs I knew every note of but couldn't place, but mostly there were songs that were instantly familiar from the first note or two.

It was incredible. I couldn't turn it off. I first tuned in Wednesday afternoon on my drive home from work, and wanted to sit in my car listening. Thursday morning, I found the station streaming on the web, but eventually I had to switch off because I couldn't concentrate on work.

These songs are perfect little gems of culture. Listening to them one after the other, you become aware of just how much talent and energy goes into them. A minute's worth of music to accomplish so much: to invoke mood, to explain a premise, to establish expectations.

Nameless studio musicians in tight, jazzy harmonies inform us they've got a gorilla for sale, or that Cathy and Patty are cousins.

Smooth, earnest voices assure a young woman in the city that she might just make it after all, or that there are places where everybody knows your name.

Balladeers introduce us to vigilante loners: rebels, knights without armor, the rippin'est, roarin'est, fightin'est men.

And wonderful instrumentals: the syncopated jazz themes of impossible missions, bass-heavy intros to wacky precinct stations and night courts, synthesized evocations of the limits of space and imagination.

I happened to be tuned in Thursday while driving to lunch. At noon, the theme from The Rockford Files abruptly cut off, a new station was identified, and Elvis Costello's "Radio Radio" began playing.

So you had better do as you are told
You better listen to the radio

I know the TV theme songs were just a stunt, a silly placeholder designed to lure a broad demographic to the frequency. I know that it wouldn't be long before I would tire of the nostalgia and the culture-critic impulses such nostalgia always raises in me. Still, since Thursday afternoon, I've felt a sting of disappointment and loss every time I get in my car and face the same choices I have every day. Another modern rock station is just a tired variation on everything else, but for a few days, we were listening to something rare and new.

Knitting Update

I buckled down and finished the Cobblestone Pullover last weekend. I've worn it four times already, and I'll probably wear it again today. Here I am modeling it, in what S. criticizes as a MySpace angle.

Generally good pattern. The garter stitch circular yoke gives the sweater a medieval, Robin Hood-ish look, which is growing on me -- it makes my chest and shoulders look broad. I did the garter stitch welt at the bottom in a smaller needle size, which I think keeps it from flaring out. I hated the garter stitch sleeve cuffs, so in the end I snipped the yarn, picked out the cuffs, and knit new plain cuffs that finished with a short, reverse stockinette roll.

I've got two sock projects in process. One I will talk about when they're done, but the other is the pair I started in Maine last month. I call them the "Mummy Case" socks.

A little weird looking, but "mummy" says they fit nicely. I did some Cat Bordhi Riverbed-style increases on the bottom, a short-row heel, and then decreased up the back. I drew lines to highlight the shaping: red for gusset increases/decreases, yellow for the short row "seam." The heel seems to cup the foot pretty tightly. I probably wouldn't do this again, but it was in interesting experiment.

I am the Boy Next Door

I followed the link from Mel's blog to OKCupid's Online Dating Persona Test. My cautious and repressed relationship history usually means that such tests yield upsetting or irrelevant results, but this outcome actually seems pretty accurate. It identifies me as the Boy Next Door.

But what I find interesting is not so much what my test results say about me, but the particular taxonomy of the test itself. Like MBTI, it's built on 4 dichotomies:

Random	Deliberate
Gentle	Brutal
Love	Sex
Dreamer	Master

I suspect this might just be a re-labeling of the Myers-Briggs dichotomies; maybe something like this?

Gentle/Brutal	Introversion/Extraversion
Dreamer/Master	iNtuition/Sensing
Sex/Love	Thinking/Feeling
Random/Deliberate	Perceiving/Judging

Which makes me an INFP when it comes to dating. I can see that. What do you think? Have I got these matched up right?

Minced Oaths

Go read rcclive's tale of cascading medical administrative errors. That she can call this a "comedy" speaks to the strength of her spirit. Personally, I'd begin to think that a bureaucratic universe was conspiring to kill me.

As I was composing my comment on her post, I was trying to think of an appropriate (for lack of a better word) ejaculation. "Good God" and "Good Lord" don't mean anything to me. Curse words seemed inappropriate. So I just settled on "Good Grief."

Googling "creative ejaculations" wasn't really helpful -- it was a bit icky in fact. Eventually, I found this handy list of minced oaths from the Phrase Finder.

And if you're in the mood for a good adolescent laugh, check out the Great Internet Swear Word Project.

---

Oh, and while I'm on the topic of language, I should mention that my final, written appeal for the license plate "TOE UP" was rejected. I should have selected something else, but I was annoyed. So I just renewed my existing tags and asked for the balance in a refund.

Me want

I'm sure you're seeing the news everywhere: Amazon has released their eBook reader, the Kindle. How funny that the book displaying on the device at the start of the demo video is Diamond Age, a novel about how an eBook changes one girl's life and reshapes the world.

My profession, of course, will be unable to respond.

Biggest draw? Free wireless access to Wikipedia.

Dear Santa, I have been a very good boy this year....

Very brief break from socks

Last weekend, I had one of those happy moments when I was vaguely interested in knitting something different, saw a pattern that appealed to me, and found the perfect yarn sitting in my stash.

A couple years ago, the Stash Fairy had provided me with some lovely, blue, baby alpaca cashmere -- I think trying to tempt me into lace shawls. I decided it would be perfect to make the Henry scarf from the Fall issue of Knitty.

And I initially enjoyed the project. I crept forward, carefully following the instructions, not really understanding the purpose of the odd stitch repeats (right side: k2, sl2 wyif; wrong side: p2, sl2 wyib) until I suddenly realized that I was creating a woven effect.

But criminently, these rows are long -- 452 stitches. And if you screw up the positioning of your repeats, you lose the herringbone effect which is the whole point. Still, I figured I would get to the point that I could "read" the fabric, and could stop counting obsessively.

I would be wrong. I was sitting on an airplane, reaching the end of row 34, when I discovered that the whole row is off. Worse, when I sat down yesterday to start picking back, I realized that row 33 is off too. I'm not sure I like this well enough to tink 900 stitches.

Like a fool, this was the only project I brought with me on my trip. So yesterday, Mom and I popped up to Halcyon so I could return to sock land. One skein of Sockotta and a set of 40" Addi Turbos, and I'm back where I belong.

I'm sorry

This is what comes of my pedantic, writer-based prose style.

I'm truly sorry. I should work harder to be more readable.

Pick me pick me pick me

Since I am (like many of my people) deeply scarred by the repeated experiences of being picked last for ball games, I feel ridiculously honored that crankygrrrrrl tagged me for this meme thing: open the book you’re currently reading to page 161 and read the fifth sentence on the page, then think of 5 bloggers to tag.

Having just finished Michael Chabon's Gentlemen of the Road last night, I'm between books. But the fifth sentence on page 161 is a doozy:

But the remainder of the journey to the apartments of the kagan partook of the labyrinthine tedium of a dream, and she was never afterward able to recall it, or to say how, in the darkness, with her last visit to the palace having occurred in her girlhood, with her mind disordered by the draft and the iron flavor of blood in her mouth, she managed to conduct the thieves, with accuracy and haste, to the heart of the heart of her world.

Isn't that first part great? "Partook of the labyrinthine tedium of a dream."

So let's see: who do I pick now?

1. My honeybunch, of course
   
2. S. is blogless, but she could probably respond creatively in her Flickr stream. Besides, this passage sounds like something she'd like: all Jamesian and shit.
   
3. Cat, because I'm wondering if she's like me and most of the books she reads are less than 161 pages
   
4. Stash Fairy, because I'm curious

You know what? I can't limit it to 5, because this is too much fun. If you're reading this, consider yourself the 5th person tagged -- especially if you're Jerry, Mary, Micah, Jacki, or Travis. And Matt, if you're not reading anything, put Bridget on.

Whirlwind Toe

Cat Bordhi's New Pathways for Sock Knitters includes instructions for a "Whirlpool Toe," a toe-up version of the Star Toe. I call my variation the "Whirlwind Toe." It was inspired by Dawn Brocco, who when knitting top down advises you to decrease at 6 points every 3rd round until there are about 18 stitches, then decrease every round to 6 stitches.

My instructions assume you know how to knit with a Magic Loop, using one circular needle, 40 inches or longer.

Whirlwind Toe (Cliffs Notes Version)
Verbose Instructions below

• Turkish cast-on 3 stitches.
• Knit 1/2 round.
• Knit 1 round with both working yarn and tail.
• Increase at 6 points every round until there are 30 stitches (24 for thicker yarns).
• Increase at 6 points every third round until you reach desired circumference.

Whirlwind Toe (Verbose)

Turkish cast-on 3 stitches

• Hold your circular needle so that both ends are together, pointed to the right.
• Pull the bottom needle to the right, and hold your top needle together with the bottom cord.
• Start your yarn in back of the needles, leaving a 9" tail hanging.
• Wrap the yarn over toward you, down across the front and up the back of the needles.
• Repeat until you've made 3 loops around your needles.
• You'll use the bottom needle as your working needle to knit the stitches which are wrapped around the top (or "left") needle.

First increase round

• Knit across the 3 stitches on the "top" needle. Be sure to keep your stitches snug on the "bottom" needle.
• Hold working yarn and tail together, and work 1 complete round.
  (There are now 6 stitches on each side, 12 in all.)

Second increase round

• Drop the tail, and knit with only one strand of yarn.
• Repeat *YO, K2* for one round. This sets up 6 increase points, using yarnovers for increasing. There are 18 stitches on your needles.
  

Third and Fourth increase rounds

• Repeat *YO, K1tbl, K2* for one round (24 stitches on your needles).
  IMPORTANT: You must knit into the back of the yarnover stitches. This twists them, so they won't leave holes in your knitting.
• Repeat *YO, K1tbl, K3* for one round (30 stitches on your needles).

Switch to increasing every third round

• Knit two rounds plain, making sure to knit into the back of any yarnover stitches.
• On the next round, repeat *YO, K5* (36 stitches)
• Knit two rounds plain, making sure to knit into the back of your yarnovers.
• Repeat *YO, K6* around (42 stitches)
• Knit two rounds plain. (You know how to handle yarnovers by now, right?)
  

Continue increasing in this manner, with 6 yarnovers every third round, followed by two plain rounds, until you reach your desired stitch circumference. If that circumference is not a multiple of six, just do as many increases as you need.

Toes

What little knitting I've done this week has been all about the toes. To begin with, I've come to the sad realization that I just don't like the fit of my Just Start Knitting toe: it's too tight across the front, and it twists out of shape. So I decided to experiment with anatomical correctness.

Cool, huh? It begins like the "Just Start Knitting" sock, but after an inch I stop increasing on one side. The toe section is longer, and seems to fit much, much better. And I'm loving this yarn -- half wool, and half mohair, silk, and nylon. I bought it from the Legendary Pat at the spring stash orgy.


My other toe problem concerned the LibraryThing socks. Not only were the toes uncomfortably tight, I ran out of yarn six rounds before the end. I tried to find someone with a few yards of this yarn in their stash, but the Zombie's was too orange, and Brow and SB are eloping this week. Nothing left to do but amputate, scavenge the toe yarn to finish the cuff, and make new toes.

This one skein of Cider Moon "Johnny Cash" black may be the most useful yarn I've ever bought. Toes aren't anatomical, but they do fit better than the original ones do.

Is this what I think it is?

A patent for knitted socks that fit? WTF?

I've become dissatisfied with my sock toes. A while back, Stephen mentioned anatomically-correct toes. I was searching for instructions, and ran across this.

Updates, mostly about socks

Apparently, I only have so much attention to spread around. And if I post about my knitting in Ravelry and my books in LibraryThing, then clearly I have nothing to say here. So here's a sock knitting round up.

1. Speaking of LibraryThing, I met Tim Spalding the creator last week at a conference. We drank good beer and talked about Russian formalism, name authority records, gender, and places to eat in Maine. I envy his MacBook. I've decided to make a habit of knitting socks for cool guest speakers at library conferences, so here are Tim's LibraryThing socks. It doesn't show up very well, but I've put the letters L & T on the cuff in purl stitches.

2. No word yet on my appeal for the TOE UP license plate.

3. I finally finished the Deathly Hallows socks that I started back in July. The skull on the heel is adapted from Lindsay Henrick's bag, and made with Knitivity's GlowKnits: my glow-in-the-Dark Mark. I hate intarsia and it was a pain, but the socks are awesome, right?

4. I'm in the middle of teaching another sock class, the second in as many months. The classes are getting bigger: 5 people in September's class, 6 in October's. I'm barely handling it. I like assisting people up the learning curve of short-row heels on Magic Loop, but it can be a struggle.

5. I'm experimenting with gussets. You can see I added some gusset-y increases to the LibraryThing sock above. Cat Bordhi's discovery that gusset stitches don't have to be where we've always put them intrigues me, even if most of her New Pathways don't. So I thought I'd try a Spiraling Coriolis but with a different heel. I originally gave the Andersson Heel a try, but it came out too short. Mel's Widdershins is better.

I guess Sock Wars II is underway. I didn't enlist this year. But I happen to have some Debbie Bliss Cashmerino around, so I might give the sock a try.